It was a beautiful day for a drive. You know, the kind of day where the windows are down, the breeze is rolling in, and sunshine is gracing down from heaven.
I left the house in a hurry that day, running a little behind schedule.
But now that I was in the car, I exhaled, free; I made it. I was ready for the journey.
Or so I thought.
I rounded around the corner, ready to climb up the beautiful mountain to cross over the bridge at the top — when a sign, glaring, said clearly, ROAD CLOSED.
How can the road close?! This is a mountain for goodness sake! It’s a one way road. And there was no other way up.
I tried to drive around, and clearly, a truck was blocking the way uphill.
At that moment, there was no choice but to exhale deep, turn around, and lose a lot of time by going another way.
There is nothing more humbling than seeing those neon lights in our life, the ones that say ROAD CLOSED. The signs that tell you, there is no amount of effort that is going to take you uphill right now. The only way up for you, is the way down. And God has to handle the rest.
I’ve had that happen so many times in my life – with relationships, with jobs – and to tell you the truth, I’m not the most graceful when the road is closed. I have even told God I was mad at him, grumbled about it a little, and of course, cried out that question — that soul deep question.
WHY?
The WHY that tells God you’re disappointed.
The WHY that tells God that simply, you don’t know how to trust Him in this.
The WHY that expresses, you do not understand the timing or the will of God.
The WHY that admits, you are trying to be patient and not to lose confidence in Him.
The most painful part of the processing that soul cry of why, is breaking your notions of when it should happen…and opening to trust God’s notion that now is not the time.
The thing is, our perspective on our lives is so limited. I had no idea what was on top of that mountain that I could not travel there. By turning around, I had to trust blindly, and admit that I may NEVER find out. And that would be okay with me.
There are some things we will never find out on this side of eternity.
As it says in Deuteronomy 29:29,
“The secret things belong to the LORD.”
Our work is to continually trust Him with the secret things.
We are to trust Him with the things that are so close to our heart that we don’t even know how to express the tenderness of our desires. Those are the things He wants to hold in His hand – and sing over them until it is their time to come. Or He’ll hold them until He changes our hearts and desires over them.
Only God knows why some doors must be shut and why other doors remain open.
We just have to work at trusting the knowledge of God with simplicity. And not forget all the hope we have in Him.
The hope that comes from knowing God’s character and His heart toward us. When our hearts can hold on, steadfast, to who God is, it is then that we have the strength to endure and to take hope. That hope can take root, deep in our hearts.
“We also glory in tribulations, knowing that tribulation produces perseverance; and perseverance, character; and character, hope. Now hope does not disappoint, because the love of God has been poured out in our hearts by the Holy Spirit who was given to us.”
-Romans 5:3-5
We can be disappointed in a situation. We can be disappointed in God for a little while. But when we take hope – we cannot remain disappointed. Because the hope we have carries a promise – a promise that God will redeem everything one day; and a promise that His Spirit is with us and will never leave us alone.
Our work in patience, is continuing to bear our hearts honestly before God on the things we wait for, all while continuing to walk in the ways He has opened.
Even though one way may be closed, sweet girl, we mustn’t lose our stride in the open things. We have to keep walking.
See, even though I had to go around that mountain, my other route had amazing views too. And I discovered a new town I would have never found.
And so it is in our lives. One road may close for now — but what God opens in your life, and in you through the process — it’s worth the whole runaround. It’s worth the extra time. It’s worth all the why’s, the disappointment and anguish. It’s worth all of our hearts, and all of our trust.
So when that one thing closes – we can keep trusting.
We can keep hoping.
We can keep open to awe and wonder of taking a different path.
We can keep bearing our souls to God.
Keep holding on.
Keep walking through.
And stay close to His heart.
“But may the God of all grace, who called us to His eternal glory by Christ Jesus, after you have suffered a while, perfect, establish, strengthen, and settle you. To Him be the glory and the dominion forever and ever. Amen.”
– 1 Peter 5:10-11
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