Fear {Be Featured with Haley}
I just got back from the Delight retreat this Monday and I am still trying to process everything. It definitely was a week that I will never forget! It truly changed my life. One of the things that really spoke to me at the retreat was when we talked about our fears. I thought it was neat when Kristin asked us to pick up two rocks out of a bucket and then write one fear on one of the rocks and on the other rock something we think God thinks of us. So as I wrote “worrying” on one rock and then when it came to writing on the rock of what God thought of me, the only word right then that popped up was “beautiful” no other word would show up in my head. What was crazy after that was how my friend Ashlynne at the retreat that night took me to go find a note that she had accidently
Taken earlier in the day, because each of us girls had received these notes through out the day from a lady across the country who didn’t know us and we didn’t know her. So as Ashlynne had reached for the first card from her bed with out even looking on the envelope the first thing I saw was it said “beautiful” ( and each individual note for each girl, was completely different from eachother’s!)right then and there I couldn’t believe what I was seeing before my eyes. Because not to long before I saw this envelope that said “beautiful” I had written on my rock what God had told me to write being “beautiful.” Its times like this that its just God reminding you that there is A GOD! <3 With out a doubt I highly believe that, and he doesn’t have to prove to me that he is real, because I do believe with all my heart that he is in deed real. Why I think God had me write “Worrying” on my rock for fear is because I have worried so much in my life and sometimes to the extreme and I know we all do. I never really had told my family & friends this, but I always worried about what I looked like for the longest time being my weight and then my family & friends would be worried about how skinny I was. Or I would worry about the way I looked or I always thought I wasn’t pretty enough and that all of the guys I had liked in the past didn’t like me back because I wasn’t pretty enough. But then when Kristin had us go down by the river that night to toss our fears in the river I felt that burden lift off my shoulders I felt a peace in my heart, I was no longer going to let Satan say I am not pretty enough or that a guy would not even like me because I wasn’t beautiful enough. Because I know with all of my heart someday I will meet a guy who thinks I am beautiful just the way God made me! I know that God thinks I am beautiful and that God thinks everyone one of his children our beautiful.
Another thing that was crazy to me was I got another note from this lady from across the country, who I didn’t know, she had no clue who I was and when Kristin tossed the envelopes on our beds she didn’t even look to see on them which ones would be for each person. So as I went to my room and my roommate had already gotten hers and no one was around I see this note on my pillow that says “your future husband” ( and again each individual note for each girl, was completely different from eachother’s!)and as I open it up I couldn’t believe what it said! Because another one of my fears for the longest time had been “worrying” about being single and not finding my future husband. But when I read this card as well it gave me another form of peace in my heart. Because God wanted me to leave it to him and trust in him! And I had ended up telling the girls what was crazy about the whole thing is it had been on my heart lately, that God even had spoke to me recently telling me one night to get on my hands and knees and to pray for my future husband because he had been going through a spiritual battle during that time and to write down that specific date!! (I have no clue why, but who knows ;) ) I could not believe all the things God was revealing to me the whole time at the delight retreat! And what’s even crazier is I had prayed before I attended delight that God would reveal some answers to me! And he did!! I am still so blown away by everything. It really was God teaching me and helping to not worrying about these things in my life and to fully give my heart to him and trust in him. It’s amazing in what he can do when we give our hearts to him!
Because “I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
your works are wonderful,
I know that full well.” – Psalms 139:14One of my favorite verses about fear;
“Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.” -Joshua 1:9
