{Dear Me} Dear 18. . .

by: Kristen Ungerecht

Dear 18,

Oh, darling! You have so much in store for you in the days to come. God has so much in store for you- a lot of change, a lot of growth, a lot of new. You’ll be off to learn about that one thing that most makes sense for you to study… to go deeper in that field you want to explore. Take the time to learn, but don’t lose what makes your work your own. Maintain your own voice, further define it and allow the Lord to influence and refine it until it shines.

Don’t let that dream overpower everything else. Make time for the people you love. See your friends often. Make time for them, even if that means a phone date while you’re walking to class or driving a few hours to see them once in a blue moon. Allow room for new friends and build those friendships up, but don’t forsake maintaining the old ones. Absence makes the heart grow fonder, but sometimes absence is just absence.

Speaking of, my dear, don’t let your commitments of learning and dreaming and doing get in the way of your being. Take care of yourself spiritually. Make time for church. That to-do list will still be there Sunday afternoon and if you play your cards right, you’ll be able to finish it with plenty of time. Don’t let the “I’m too busy” excuse keep you away consistently. Stay on top of your work so you can lead a balanced life. Then go; be fed. Share your struggles, your passions, your heart with your small group. Pray with them and for them, and let them do the same for you. Receive truth, ask the tough questions, say “yes” to the Holy Spirit. Keep drawing near to God; keep seeking Him above all else. He’s going to bless that and take you so much deeper in your relationship with Him.

And when you struggle and the season of drought comes, don’t keep stubbornly walking in circles when there’s Living Water right next to you. Drink. Get in the Word. Have conversations with an accountability partner about your struggles. Go take a walk and pray. Don’t let the dry times linger. Push through and seek Jesus with your whole heart. He promises you’ll find Him. Go look.

Remember the good times in your past, but don’t let them keep you from moving forward. They may have been good ol’ days, but you have more of those to come. You’re living them – right now. Don’t let them pass you by. Be present. Live your life. Laugh loudly and often. Love in whatever voice you have left at the time – the loudest of hollers or the hoarsest of whispers; love in word and in deed, when you feel compassionate and when you don’t.

Love.

Love well.

Likewise, don’t let yourself get caught up in revisiting your mistakes. Learn to forgive yourself and move forward. You are human. You’ll make good choices and you’ll make bad choices. You’ll fall short. Don’t dwell on that to the point that you live in guilt or shame. The important thing is to learn from those times, own up to your mistakes, make them right and then give yourself the grace to continue on with your life. Christ has redeemed and forgiven you and given you grace upon grace. Who are you to withhold that from yourself when it belongs to you already? You are forgiven, dear one. Let it go and move on to greater things.

You may not realize it right now, but you’re going to shine Jesus to people. You’re going to be the only Christian that some of the people around you know and you’ll be the only Christian that some of the people around you can stand to be around. They’re going to tell you so, to your face. They’re also going to disagree with a lot of your beliefs and you’re going to learn how to handle that with grace and love. You’re going to learn that when the Holy Spirit speaks through you, people hear beyond what they know of the ‘Christian’ and begin to hear the Spirit Himself. And it’s a humbling, beautiful thing. Let the Spirit work in you, through you, around you.

And when times get tough, know you have your people. You know who they are. Family. Friends. Turn to someone you can trust and talk it out. Don’t struggle on your own; we weren’t made for that. You have a community for a reason. Utilize it. Participate in it. You’ll be surprised by how much growth and beauty you find there. Don’t worry if you don’t yet have a solid community where you are. It’s coming. It’s coming your way and it is going to amaze and humble and strengthen you in so many ways. Keep praying over it and engage where you can in the meantime.

And, dear sweet one, be bold. Don’t let insecurities or fear get in your way. Try new things. Meet new people. Go where you’re led, even if it doesn’t make sense to anyone, including yourself. Speak up when it’s hard, even if your voice shakes and cracks along the way. Have the hard conversations, really take the time to listen to others; love when it’s easier to hate, and serve when you’d rather be selfish. Be brave with your life.

Those are the most beautiful stories, the ones that are brave.

And believe it or not, you will be brave. Much more so than you may imagine right now. Not of your own power and volition. No, you’re not much on your own. But the One you follow is. His power is made perfect in weakness. So don’t worry about any of it – live your life, let this chapter of your story be written, and give God the glory.

Use this time and decide to do something amazing with it.

Everything else will work out.

Love,
23