When is the last time?

I sat in a gym watching my son play basketball all day yesterday. It was wonderful. . .other than my bleacher-butt today (sorry to all those people who don’t use the word “butt”. . .but my butt is not used to sitting all day in a gym on uncomfortable bleachers)!! To me, one of my favorite places to be in the world this time of year is inside a gym listening to the squeak of basketball shoes, watching fast-breaks and cheering for our team. . . I even like the sweaty smell as gross as that might be! ;)

As I was sitting there watching the cheerleaders & all the junior high and high school girls sitting in the stands,  I wondered about their stories. I wondered who they had in their lives who are loving on them. Who hugged them last? When was the last time they heard “I love you” from someone who really meant it? Have they been cutting? Have they been having suicidal thoughts? What did they think about last night as they went to bed? Did they eat today or are they starving themselves?  Did they run to the bathroom and throw up after they ate lunch today? Did their boyfriend push them too far and they are living in shame? What did they say to themselves when they looked in the mirror this morning? When was the last time they felt like someone cared?

When is the last time YOU walked by a teen girl and wondered about them and their lives? When is the last time that you even just gave a teen girl a smile as you were walking by them? When is the last time you sat down and talked to a teen girl? When is the last time that you heard their heart?  When is the last time that you shared the true hope of Jesus Christ with them?

Seriously. . . do you not understand that if you are an older women who loves Jesus, we are CALLED/COMMANDED/EXPECTED to be there to disciple and mentor younger woman??  I am tired of hearing “Oh, what you are doing for these girls is so wonderful!” Yes, it is wonderful and I am so humbled and honored to be part of these amazing girls lives. But, guess what??? You can too. You should be. One way or the other, you have a platform God has given you to speak into younger girls lives. I don’t care if you are 18 and reading this. . .you have 14 year olds that look up to you. If you are in your 60’s, I personally NEED you!! Every single one of us women need older women in our lives. . .women who have been there before us with life experience and with being able to point us back to the truth of scripture!!!

We are a body of Christ. . .we are sisters-in-Christ. We all have been given different gifts and tools for specific reasons. I am not an eloquent speaker, nor am I a good writer. But I can give a hug and I can listen. I know some of you are saying, “but. . . I don’t think I can relate or have anything to offer!”  OR “I don’t know any teen girls” OR “They scare me” OR “I am not equipped” OR “I don’t even know how I can invest in a teen girls life!”   Here are just a quick few things (and I hope to go into more detail in the future) you can do. . . #1–PRAY. Commit to pray for these sweet girls! Pray for those who God has called to lead in person and online. Pray that God would open doors for you to personally invest in.  #2–IF you have a cell phone or access to Facebook or instagram, YOU HAVE BEEN GIVEN A PLATFORM. Use it!!! It doesn’t take two minutes of your day to share a verse or reach out by text or messaging showing that you are thinking about them!  #3–If you can share $5, $10, $15, $100 to put towards scholarship funds, so girls can come attend an intensive at the Delight House, do it!  These events are life-changing!  #4–Pray about starting a local group—we are excited to be sharing this new opportunity in 2016!! Stay tuned!!  There is so much more that I will be sharing later. But my point of this is that every single person reading this right now has something to contribute. . .whether prayer, online, in person, etc.

God has given me a heart that beats for these precious girls. And my heart’s desire is for every girl to hear God’s truth. For every girl to have an older woman to invest in their life.  I had written this letter a couple weeks ago that I intended to mail to a few friends. But I feel like I need to share it with you today. . .  this is truly from the depths of my heart. . . just keeping it real! :)

“Hi friend!

Where do I start? I don’t honestly even know where to begin. But I need you. The girls need you. Whether it is for prayer, discipling/mentoring or if it is financially supporting a girl, I am writing you because I pray that you understand how vital it is to come along side these young women. If we are truly to be Proverbs 31 and Titus 2 women, we are called to  mentor, disciple, serve & love these precious girls. WE are called to encourage them and build them up in their faith.

Older women likewise are to be reverent in behavior, not slanderers or slaves to much wine. They are to teach what is good, and so train the young women to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled, pure, working at home, kind, and submissive to their own husbands, that the word of God may not be reviled. (Titus 2:3-5)

Last month at the Delight House was a time that really can’t be adequately expressed in words. We worshipped around the fireplace. We sat in stillness and quietness just praying. We journaled, we dug deep in the word of God, we laughed, we cried, we listened to the Holy Spirit. God powerfully worked in all our lives. None of us left unchanged.

The number one question I get about the Delight House is “Is this home for troubled girls?” From the outside, most of these girls look like they have it all together. They are the type-A driven, perfectionists who want to please. They are the ones leading the youth groups, leading worship, getting good grades, etc. Typically from all appearances, they are thriving. But. . . they are SILENTLY SUFFERING. Last month in a room of seven girls, we dealt with suicide watch, fresh cut marks, eating disorders, abuse, masturbation, shame from sexual sin, deep gripping fear, pornography addiction and on and on.

My heart is truly heavy today because this represents only seven of the 600+ Delight girls. And there are hundreds and hundreds who need the love and support that we were able to give last week. Our incredible leaders loved so well. They prayed with the girls, spoke truth into their lives & we were able to see changes in their countenances. We are now following up with the girls & encouraging them to continue to dig deep in the word. We have an online group, but as leaders we are also texting them, following up via phone, voxer, etc. These girls need women in their lives. God is continuing to make himself very real to them in their daily walks and we want to be there to encourage them! Nothing brings me more joy in life than to know that these girls lives will never be the same & that He is using us as older women to share life alongside them.

I opened my eyes during worship the last evening together and looked around at the precious faces . . I saw a visible change since the first day they arrived. And I thought “my heart’s desire is for them to come w/o having to worry about paying a registration fee.” Money should not ever hinder them from coming. That is my dream! And I know God can make it happen. We recently opened up the wedding intensive workshop. It will take place in February. And I KNOW it is going to be incredible. I know the things that God has placed on my heart and I know that it could make a huge impact on their future marriages. I know that if I would have had something like this at the beginning of my marriage, it could have prevented a lot of issues. BUT—how many newlyweds or engaged women can afford to spend money on something like this? My heart wants to make the future {BE workshops} available free of charge for these young women.

We have an overhead of $1800 a month just for the Delight House. Currently, we aren’t even covering the costs. We have a $3600 bill for the non-profit due the end of December & I don’t know where it is going to come from. Sometimes it seems overwhelming and impossible. BUT—I do know that this is God’s house and His will. I know that He has beautiful plans for the future of Delight & Be. And I KNOW that He has faithfully provided step by step. It’s truly been the greatest faith-building experience of my life. I know He loves these girls even more than I do.

First of all, I am coming to you to ask for prayer. Will you commit to praying for the future of Delight? For these precious amazing young women? For the leaders? Would you pray about being involved either by committing to prayer, by serving and leading in the future, and/or financially? Over the next month, we will be doing a year-end fundraiser. This fundraiser will be to cover the cost of the non-profit insurance, to start a future scholarship fund and to help complete the last projects for the Delight House (insulation, porch, etc.). In 2016, we will be starting a way in which you can commit to giving monthly. I will be completely honest. . .this is the part of “ministry” that makes me want to cry & run away, but I also see how God is powerfully moving and working in the girls lives & it is going to take money in order to allow us to minister, love and serve them. So I am asking you to please pray about helping support the girls. We are now officially a 501c3 non-profit which makes my heart so happy!!!
I am also asking one last favor. If you are interested in being part of Delight whether by prayer, leading at a future event, leading online, leading in your local community, etc., PLEASE respond and let me know. I am starting a group online for women who want to invest in these girls lives. There are beautiful things planned for the future of Delight & Be and I would LOVE for you to be part of the girls lives. Email me at info@delighthouse.org.

Thank you for taking time to read this long letter. Thank you for your love, your support and for your prayers.

Big hugs and blessings,
Kristin